Defining and Becoming: Your Path to the Good Life
A few years ago, I took a moment to sit down with my journal for a heart-to-heart with myself. Feeling reflective, I wanted to check in and ensure I was on course for the life I wanted. I asked myself two questions:
What is my intention for my life?
Who do I intend to be?
The Core Questions
These questions were meant to dig into an overarching question I have for myself: How do I make the future version of me proud and pleased with the way I’ve lived my life?
The Process
While I am going to share my answers below, my individual answers are irrelevant. The process is what I’m hoping you’ll find helpful. Everyone is going to have different answers, and that is the point: asking yourself the questions and breaking down your answers until they are more understandable and more actionable.
My Responses
Here’s a bit about my own answers and how they guided my process.
1. Interest:
My Answer: I want my life to interest me. I want to be interesting to myself.
My Process: This response led me to asking myself, "What makes life interesting to me?" I made a list and then broke it down even further. Every time I hit a lofty term like "interesting," I defined it more specifically. As I did, the list turned into actionable steps, giving me a clear path to what it means to me to live an interesting life – a key to my personal definition of fulfillment.
2. Love and Connection:
My Answer: I want to love well.
My Process: After coming to this answer, I dug in to further define it. What does it mean to me to love well? My answers led me to a list of attributes I strive to embody. It helped to put words to what I strive for in my relationships with myself and with others. Once I had named the attributes, I could translate them into actions to nurture relationships and feelings of love and connection in my life.
3. Accomplishment:
My Answer: I want to feel accomplished.
My Process: Here, I listed things that make me feel accomplished and identified what sort of things give me this feeling. While I included some specific items, this list centered around categories that allow for change over time.
Tips for Your Process
The trick to the process is, any time you answer a question with a lofty or abstract term (“interesting,” “love well,” “accomplished”), see if you can break things down and further define them for yourself. The goal is to have a deeper understanding as well as actions you can take.
Reflection
Three life-changing years later, I'm surprised and amused to find these same pillars still hold true for me. While my action items may have changed, the concepts continue to guide me and my decisions.
The best way to ensure fulfillment is through intentionality: trying, reflecting, asking high-quality questions, deciding, and acting.
Next Steps
What are your intentions for your life? Who do you intend to be? Take a moment to reflect and consider writing down your thoughts. I'd love to hear your insights and support you on your journey to living an intentional, fulfilling life!
With Warmth,
Amy