Be the Leading Lady
In the movie "The Holiday," there's this great line:
"Iris, in the movies, we have leading ladies, and we have best friends. You, I… I can tell, are a leading lady. But for some reason, you’re behaving like the best friend."
From a young age, many of us socialized as women are taught to be modest, to play small, and not to rock the boat. We're encouraged to make others feel comfortable, seen, loved, and supported, and we often fail to realize when this is at the expense of developing our own passions, dreams, and desires. We're conditioned to be pillars of support in other people's lives and careers -- enabling, uplifting, and winning them successes but somehow missing from our own narratives.
How often do you define yourself by who you are for others? Whether it's as wife, mother, daughter, diligent employee, or generous community member, it's easy to define ourselves by these roles. We become the supporting characters in our own stories, allowing others to take the spotlight while we lovingly celebrate their wins.
Embrace Your Leading Role
In the movie, Iris responds:
"You’re so right. You’re supposed to be the leading lady of your own life, for God’s sake. Arthur, I’ve been going to a therapist for three years. And she’s never explained anything to me that well."
What if we embraced and normalized the idea of each of us playing the lead role in our own life? What if we truly believed that finding and showing up as our authentic selves was the greatest gift we could offer – not just to ourselves, but also to those we love and serve?
Steps to Become the Leading Lady of Your Life
1. Shift Your Perspective: I’ve compiled a list of books that have supported me in my journey. Check it out!
2. Identify Your Values and Priorities: Take time to reflect on what truly matters to you. What are your values, passions, and dreams?
3. Set Boundaries: Establish healthy boundaries to protect your time, energy, and well-being. Say no when necessary and prioritize self-care to maintain balance and harmony in your life.
4. Embrace Self-Love and Self-Care: Treat yourself with kindness, compassion, and respect.
5. Take Inspired Action: Don't wait for permission or the "perfect" moment. Work to align your actions and decisions with your values to create a life that resonates with your authentic self.
6. Seek Support and Guidance: Surround yourself with supportive people who uplift and encourage you. Find your spirit people. Consider working with a coach or therapist to gain clarity, overcome challenges, and unlock your potential.
I’m not suggesting every scene should be about you – but if I were to ask you what’s important in your life, would you be on the list?